Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Randomize
