you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Someone signed my nipple.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
