make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
