sarcasm needs its own font
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I will pee on everything he values.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize
