I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
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