If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
