i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Randomize
