I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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