so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
My cat gives me a boner
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
