Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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