I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
