He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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