STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
