Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Randomize
