Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Randomize
