oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
