so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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