I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
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