My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
