So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Found your dick twin last night
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Randomize
