Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
