Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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