Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
