Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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