I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
