Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
