It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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