when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
