ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
