a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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