everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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