I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
