I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Randomize
