oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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