it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
