Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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