Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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