wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
