so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
