i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
