I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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