Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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