i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize