i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
