I am puke
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
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