People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
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