So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
