i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
