hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Randomize
