What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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